Having a Healthy Divorce
Research from the Centers for Disease Control confirms that one-fifth of marriages will end in divorce within five years and almost half will end in divorce prior to 20 years. Divorce typically brings feelings of anger, guilt, frustration, and anxiety. While it does take both spouses agreeing that a divorce will be amicable in order for that to occur, you can always do your part to try to establish a foundation that fosters communication and creates an environment for a healthy divorce.
Take Care of Yourself First
Everyone has heard of the saying that you should put the oxygen mask on yourself first before helping others. This applies to divorce, as well. Make sure to take some time for self-care. Divorce is never a happy occasion and can create emotions of fear, anger, frustration, or sadness. Take the time to ensure that you are emotionally and mentally healthy, not only to be stronger in the divorce process, but also for your children.
Many people consider divorce court a battleground with winners and losers. In most cases, divorces are a series of negotiations in which both parties get some of what they want. Creating an environment of cooperating instead of hostility can benefit your emotional health and provide a good example to your children. Ways to do this would include controlling your environment ahead of time, such as writing lists ahead of negotiations and meetings, and choosing times to visit with your attorney or spouse in which you are both prepared and calm. If you find yourself arguing loudly with your spouse during meetings, try to do most communication through email instead.
Consider mediation as an alternative to the adversarial process of divorce court. Mediators are neutral third parties who meet with both spouses in a neutral environment and provide solutions where both parties feel they have received some of what they want regarding child custody, child visitation, child support, alimony or the division of property.
Many parents are worried about how a divorce will affect their children. Statistics show that how a divorce is handled is often more important than the fact that parents are getting divorced. For example, the American College of Pediatrics research shows that if both parents are willing and dedicated to creating an environment for their children that is healthy and without anger and chaos, they will have more well-adjusted children.
Contact a Divorce Attorney
If you are facing the prospect of a divorce, you may have a lot of anxiety and anger. Make sure to visit with a therapist, or have your children visit with a therapist to find ways to handle your emotional instability and frustrations. If you need help with your divorce, contact the understanding attorneys at the law firm of Giro Law at 201-690-1642. We can help you with your divorce case and with your next steps.